hurt

i know i'm a good person. i try really hard to be one on the whole. i'm not talking about working at soup kitchens, or tutoring underprivileged children. i'm not trying to be that good... but to my friends, to the people i care about, i think that i am, overall, a pretty decent person.

it's too bad that caring about someone makes you so vulnerable. and especially the other way around. it's scary, that the more someone cares about you, the easier it is to hurt them.

maybe it would be better to just be empty inside. if i didn't care about anyone, then they wouldn't care about me. and then i wouldn't hurt anymore, and i wouldn't have to worry about hurting anyone else.

if i pretend for long enough, will it eventually become the truth?

i want to put my thoughts out here. it helps me, i think. but i'm not giving a name, or names. so please don't ask. please don't even try to guess it yourself. i want you to read this, and tell me what you think, but you don't need to know if i'm talking about any people in particular to do that.

private journal... i should just create a blog and not make it readable.

by the way, kill bill was awesome. can't wait for volume 2.